The Fat Chick in Front of Me Getting Ice Cream

Look, we all like ice cream but I have to say I get ice cream maybe….maybe 4 times a year.  I happen to be getting some today…baked out of my mind…and as you can imagine I was standing behind a fat chick.  Now I dont mind lines and have no particular issue with fat people.  But Ice Cream?  Come on! We all have our vices and I really am not trying to pass judgment.  You give me a bottle of rum, a blunt and a 20year old hooker and I’m all in….so I understand weaknesses, but the irony that every single time I get ice cream I am forced to stand behind a fat chick that makes topping selection look like a homeless drunk at the Shoney’s Buffet is just too much for me to handle.

I just wanted to share…and for those of you who are struggling with your weight….I’m sorry for the cruel hearted jab.  But YOUR FAT…..DONT EAT ICE CREAM.  Use anti-cellulite creams……do something!  Enjoy your Saturday…god knows I am.

Man….maybe next time I should bring some Murad Firm & Tone Serum with me to hand out on the beach!

Always

Kip Diggins